Butterflies are back and so is the sense of betrayal and hurt. Today someone who betrayed my trust during a really difficult time in my work life returned from extended leave and made a special point of coming to see me “to see how you are doing” (insert condensing sympathy voice). This was after they had supposedly been “my support” in a meeting I didn’t know was formal and took notes throughout for senior management to use as a means of forcing me out of my senior management role. And then when I was “encouraged” to step down from my position phoned me at home to “see how your feeling” and when I said devastated didn’t like that response so end the phone call with “Oh well…when will your family be home?” AKA you’re their problem now…not mine! This betrayal was compounded by the fact that my direct manager had instigated this process..despite the fact that I had repeatedly ask for assistance but received none because I “usually coped” (had been doing so for 6 years without weekly or monthly support meetings that ALL other managers got).

Then these feelings have dredged up the worst betrayal of all. At the same time as this was happening and I was at my most vulnerable (no job security, forced out of my role and reacting badly to antidepressant leaving me suicidal and unable to function) my husband of 19 years in full midlife crisis mode felt life was passing him by or that he’d missed out on a better life and so via facebook  began facebook flirtations with an ex-snog and someone he had never snogged but wanted to and was in the process of setting up  catch up when next in NZ “because {I} wont come”. I found the messages, we began relationship counselling and the marriage was very rocky for a long time and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to stay married but after 5 months we seem to heading in the right direction

It’s cruel that the person who was on the receiving end of some really shitty shitty treatment is the one that continues to pay for it long after the others have moved on.


Oh the shame ….caught watching afternoon soapies in bed with mum….ummm it’s research …it’s like reverse animal planet!!

Oh the shame ….caught watching afternoon soapies in bed with mum….ummm it’s research …it’s like reverse animal planet!!


halofiveohfive:

Lily Von Puggle and Ruby Rose eating an Ice block on a hot summers day in Tasmania.

halofiveohfive:

Lily Von Puggle and Ruby Rose eating an Ice block on a hot summers day in Tasmania.

(via animals-eating-cake)


sparkly-sassmaster:

Tumblr | via Tumblr on @weheartit.com - http://whrt.it/13Yt7UL FUCK YOU JIMMY

sparkly-sassmaster:

Tumblr | via Tumblr on @weheartit.com - http://whrt.it/13Yt7UL FUCK YOU JIMMY




Couldn’t be trusted on face book or tumblr…how’s twitter going to be any different?!!



Can I helps you?

Can I helps you?